Comment on any of the following meeting topics from November’s meeting, or anything else you want to!
- Accepting uncontrolled shifting
- Internal abusers
- Relationships
- “Just get over it.” Dealing with comments like that, feeling misunderstood and feeling like we are too much for others to deal with.
- Shame
- US of Tara TV show
- Upcoming holidays
thinking about a couple of these topics. i know that i tend to shift a lot more than other people in the group, but for me, it was counterproductive to try to control shifting. in the case of my system, it worked better to make sure that everyone who came out had access to the information they needed to handle situations. that isn’t to say that the little kids don’t tend to be a little shy around strangers, or that they speak in their own voices in inappropriate situations. and we’ve been lucky that the work we’ve done has been the kind of places where at least a couple of parts were interested, and where a certain amount of shifting was actually helpful. like, at the shelter, it was very helpful to have the input of little kids inside! or in teaching, it was good to have different peoples’ perspectives on how to explain things.
we are excited AND stressed about the holidays coming up. the excited part is from getting to make lots of things and make presents and do crafts and cooking. the stressed is from not having much money, and trying not to let that make us get triggered to when i was a kid and we were poor and i did not get very many presents cause i was the one who would not make a big fuss if i did not and everyone else in the family would throw a fit so they got lots of things and i did not. mostly i do not NEED presents but it is still nice to GET presents. i am trying to remember it is better to give then receive but i do still want to RECEIVE! but also, i am making a lot of cool things and that part is fun and happy.
Christmas was fun for me! For us. we are thankful because it truly felt “full”.
ANd – Relationships – why are they so freakin’ hard? I feel like I don’t understand them or how they work, or how they are “supposed” to work.