What kinds of things come to mind when you think of “external children”? Go ahead – free associate or whatever, about this topic.
New Landscape ~ DID/MPD Support Group
New York support group for people with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) / Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD)
Well I just read an article in my Many Voices newsletter written by an adult child of a DID person. It was pretty depressing. The adult child pretty much talked about how her mother with DID, ruined her (the kid’s) life. The kid went through 7 years of therapy because of growing up with a DID parent.
I don’t have kids. And I’ve feared all along that I could “ruin” those around me just because of who I am. And that especially a kid who depends on me, or even just looks up to me – and who really knows who I am…. would end up ruined somehow. They might as well be living with or looking up to an alcoholic…. someone who could blow up or be this or that at any moment. The dynamic seems similar. And the kid could easily be put into a parent role – forcing role reversal.
Eck. Anyway – this article depressed me and made me feel sad and hopeless. I know we are all different and if I had a kid it might be different than the girl who wrote the article. I’m sure I shouldn’t base my thoughts on what she wrote totally. But it did confirm my fears – that I have the potential to ruin others around me or cause them LOTS of pain just be being who I am.
Blah – gotta think about all this. .. at the same time, I’ve held full time work and am pretty functional – have been for a couple years or so. The thing is, I need down time. I can be “on” at work and out in the world and do lots of things very competently – but when it comes to being home – I do lots of shifting and “letting down”.
…… :o/